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Guys, Here’s What It’s Actually Like to Be a Woman
That one is a new for any personal woman who has put herself out there. The detection it takes for a beautiful to say yes [to a good with a man] is beyond anything I can better.
But think about guys bragging makking which micro-brewed beer they like, which concealed-carry pistol they favor SSluts which car they drive. Both sexes are suckers for status-seeking through consumerism. Guys know that some of our maaking competition tactics are stupid and ridiculous. This is where the similarities end, however. Makinb face much different social vulnerabilities. But they worry a lot more about their sexual reputation among their acquaintances, co-workers, family and neighbors. Specifically, they fret about the existential reputational threat posed by slut-shaming in modern society. Women are vicious to each other about slut-shaming.
Imagine the anxiety that comes with an ill-timed one-night stand or an indiscreet friend with benefits. It can be paralyzing for some women. This creates a downward spiral of young women feeling like they have to offer more and more sex to more and more guys just to stay in the mating game. Thus, slut-shaming is a way of enforcing a more restrained sexual norm on other women so that not all women have to become more promiscuous than any of them would like. She knows they are watching and judging.
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Weirder things have happened. They will ask about what happened. So guys in that situation should not try to steal a woman away from her friends as soon as possible. Instead, just get her number so you can text her about getting together later, in private. If she starts dating you, that too will affect her status within her peer group, either positively or negatively. She can already anticipate how that will play out. Partly it depends on your qualities as a Sluts making men lust. Her friends will also judge her based on how you treat her. Are you sexually exploiting and emotionally neglecting her like that creep last year?
That lowers her status. Or are you taking care of her like a potential Mr. That raises her status. This is as much for you and her as it is for her friends, who face a harder job in evaluating you than she does. You were an unknown quantity after all, an uncertain bet. They need time to appreciate your strengths and accept your weaknesses. But while their jury is still out, your new girlfriend will suffer a temporary loss of status. Making a good impression right away speeds up their deliberation. Most of the sex differences in human mating strategies emerge, directly or indirectly, from that basic fact.
But in the short term, unwanted pregnancy is one of their biggest fears. Getting knocked up can be a career-wrecking, family-shaming, mate-value-decreasing disaster, even if the baby daddy has great genes and promises to be there when the shitty diapers hit the fan. We know from anthropological studies of hunter-gatherer societies that if a guy abandons a woman or he has a hunting accident and gets killed, the likelihood of her baby surviving drops alarmingly. Very few guys want to become a stepdad, and women understand this. Their instinctive worry about unwanted pregnancy is often stronger than their conscious trust in birth control. Female mammals have been getting pregnant since before the dinosaurs went extinct.
She still has to worry about the armada of sexually transmitted diseases STDs sailing toward her aboard your dirty penis. When a woman gets one, it can often lead to infertility, or it can infect the baby during birth. The STD stakes are simply higher for women. This is one reason why women evolved a stronger propensity for sexual disgust toward anything that tends to promote the spread of STDs: You could be Sluts making men lust nicest guy in the world with everything going for you, but if you roll up to a woman trying to run game looking or smelling like you just climbed out from the bottom of a third-world public toilet, these are some of the fears that may be driving her to keep her distance.
In fact, she cares more about how you smell than you can imagine. And so is poor hygiene. They evolved to want different things at different times. You might think, like the seduction peddlers in the PUA community often do, that if you were an attractive woman, you could sleep with any guy you wanted, get laid every weekend, and it would be awesome. Yes, every beautiful, bright woman knows she could seduce almost any man for a quick fuck. But that is rarely what she wants. She usually wants a boyfriend, at least. And her experience, if she is single, is that she has failed, over and over and over, to get the guys she really respects and admires, the great catches, the Mr.
Rights, to stay with her as long as she wants. This is due in no small part to her struggle to understand her own taste in men. This internal conflict is more pronounced in younger women than older, more experienced women; but it never fully goes away, and it only makes dating that much more frustrating. Most young women want it all—education, career, money, status, love, marriage, kids, meaning and purpose. The oxytocin magic works reliably. This makes them emotionally vulnerable. The better the sex and the more they like you, the faster it happens. So will you fuck her for one night and never call her again?
That hurts for a week or longer, if she really liked you. Will you hook up for three months until she falls in love with you, then evaporate for no obvious reason? That will hurt her for a year or longer. All of this makes the dating scene incredibly frustrating for women. But they do fantasize about being sexually dominated and controlled by handsome, caring and capable men who operate secretly on the fringes of acceptable society. The Fifty Shades series has sold more than million copies for a reason. What is a modern woman to make of this part of her sexual-emotional circuitry? The sexual skills they require are baffling and intimidating to her, and cultivating them would increase her risk of being slut-shamed from certain corners of her life.
For guys, sex is reliably pleasant. Also, she resents your putting pressure on her to orgasm. She wants a sexual connection. They are friendly to a guy, and the next thing they know the guy thinks he has an invitation — or even a right — to sex. So then she is either a teasing bitch if she says no, or a slut if she gave in. She may have even felt like she had to give in. I have heard stories of women who felt giving oral sex was their only safe way out of an uncomfortable situation. It is easy to appreciate a nice body, but that does not mean you get to use it. Pixabay I have also heard way to many rape stories.
There is nothing for them to gain by making up a story with me. I suppose there is the authority or power structure thing, especially in work situations. But here is the thing. I have worked with a lot of very pretty women over the last 25 years. I have been alone with many of them. I have never been accused of sexual harassment. The only thing I have ever been accused of is playing favorites. Ill admit to that. If an employee puts in a lot of effort, does a good job, and makes me look good, then that employee is my favorite and will get preferential treatment over one who does not do those things.
There is nothing better in the world than to have sex with a woman who sincerely wants to have sex. At the same time I respect her enough to not ask her for anything, and I certainly would never try to make her do anything. I have had a lot of women friends over the years. Women are in a tough situation with the culture. They are supposed to be appealing, but supposed to say no. Yet if they so no they are a bitch, and a slut if they say yes. Does it seem like we react to rejection with the maturity of a child being denied a toy? Continue Reading Below Advertisement Well, you have to keep in mind that what we learn as kids is really hard to deprogram as an adult.
And what we learned as kids is that we males are each owed, and will eventually be awarded, a beautiful woman. Just a little something for graduation. When the Karate Kid wins the tournament, his prize is a trophy and Elisabeth Shue.
Neo saves the world and is awarded Trinity. Continue Reading Below Advertisement Hell, at the end of An Officer and a Gentleman, Richard Gere walks into the lady's workplace and just carries her out like he's picking up a suit at the dry cleaner. I don't need a bag. With Harry Potter, J. Rowling played with the convention by having the beautiful girl get awarded to the sidekick character Ron, but she made it a central conflict in the story that Ron is constantly worried that, since Harry is the main character, Hermione will be awarded to him instead.
Continue Reading Below Advertisement In each case, the makibg has no say in this -- compatibility doesn't matter, Skuts relationships don't matter, nothing else factors in. If the hero accomplishes his goals, he is awarded his favorite female. Yes, maklng will be dialogue that maybe makes it sound like the woman is having ken, and she will make noises like she is making the decision on her own. But we, as the audience, know that in the end the hero will "get the girl," just as we know that at the end of the month we're going to "get our paycheck.
The girl can say what she wants, but we all know that at the end, she will wind up with the hero, whether she knows it or not. I need to go defeat my demons and realize the strength was in me all along. From birth we're taught that we're owed a beautiful girl. We all think of ourselves as the hero of our own story, and we all whether we admit it or not think we're heroes for just getting through our day. So it's very frustrating, and I mean frustrating to the point of violence, when we don't get what we're owed.
Become the Man Cheaters Want. This is where the forums end, however. Directly hurts for a week or older, if she definitely liked you.
A contract has been broken. These women, by exercising their own choices, are denying it to us. It's why every Nice Guy is shocked to find that buying gifts for a girl and doing her favors won't win him sex. It's why we go to "slut" and "whore" as our default insults -- we're not mad that women enjoy sex. We're mad that women are distributing to other people the sex that they owed us. Yes, the women in these stories are being portrayed as wonderful and beautiful and perfect. But remember, there are two ways to dehumanize someone: The pretty girl gets a good job, men want her, women want to be her, everybody is happy.
The problem is that it goes way deeper than that. There are actual occasions where women aren't thinking about sex. Here, let me show you an extreme example. I'm going to quote a Free Republic thread again, because I quite frankly can't stop reading them.